Monday, 16 March 2009

What I learnt in Bristol...

First off, since the UK Ten Dead Men DVD became available to pre-order from Amazon.co.uk a couple of positive reviews have appeared from people who caught the film at SENI last year. I'm not sure what prompted this but it's fantastic to get so much support in advance of the release so if any of the reviewers are reading, thanks very much!

Speaking of which, I feel a bit cheeky asking after the amazing response I had to the IMDB comment appeal, but if anyone who has seen the film would like to help support it further we really could use your reviews on Amazon.co.uk and/or Play.com.

Anyway, I just spent an excellent weekend in Bristol with friends watching tremendously bad films. Here's what I learnt:

Stryker taught me that smoke grenades are the solution to any and all problems.

Shark in Venice taught me that there are no sharks in Venice, but there is one in Bulgaria.

Executioner Part 2 (note - there is no Executioner Part 1) taught me that you can get away with being a crazed vigilante killer as long as you were in 'Nam with the cop on your trail.

Witchcraft taught me that not all horror films require dark photography, and not all films need to be watched all the way through.

Unstoppable taught me that the quality of straight-to-DVD Wesley Snipes films is at least doubled when viewed immediately after Witchcraft.

Day of the Panther taught me that the Secret Panther School should just be called the Panther School.

Lionman and the Witchqueen taught me that a hero can sometimes appear so unlikely that even the cameraman can forget which one he is.

The Violent Breed taught me that there's always time for another briefing, bullet extraction needs to be discussed for at least 20 minutes before going ahead with the procedure, and the best way to take on an army single-handedly is to confuse them by hiding the grenades and ducking in and out of the same building at least thirty times.

If you happen to track down any of the above I seriously recommending not watching them alone (with the exception of Day of the Panther which has excellent fights and Unstoppable which is actually quite a competent thriller) as you will permanently damage your sanity. But they are excellent for shouting abuse at the TV with mates.

I also learnt that Starhyke is a rather excellent independently produced sci-fi/comedy that you must must look out for when it airs later in the year:


9 comments:

Richard Hawes said...

What do you mean there's no Executioner Part 1? The first was made in 1980.

drive2 said...

what would stephen baldwin do?

What?...Who?...No...With whom...

Chris Regan said...

RH - Exterminator?

D2 - I feel weird...

Ross Boyask said...

who ARE you???

Ross Boyask said...

WHAT???

drive2 said...

reviews to follow shortly...

that movie was "Well Good..."

What....!!??

Chris Regan said...

If you look up the phrase 'well good' in the dictionary there is a picture of Lionman.

Richard Hawes said...

Sorry for the confusion Chris. I was thinking of The Exterminator! You can see how I might have gotten confused! Still feel embarassed though! I feel so ignorant that I hadn't heard of The Executioner, Part 2.

Chris Regan said...

I would be thankful you haven't heard of Executioner Part 2, and even more thankful that you haven't seen it. It was kind of a surreal 70s nightmare of a film, and not in any kind of good way.